Out of Breath

You could have said these words…

outofbreath — Sun, 25 Jan 2009 18:43:57 +0000

“As much as we want you here with us.. we’d rather have you go and leave so you can have your dreams and be happy.“

but no…

all you did were fits of praises that I didn’t get what can make me happy.

I smiled at all of you, trying to feel glad that I effortlessly made you all happy.

Unfortunately, I can only wish to have a different family.. I can only tell my friends I hate them but don’t really mean it.. because if I did I would really have nothing.. not even a dream.

What’s left for me to do is to try to get through this lifetime.

I’m singing the only song and I’m sending this to the lonely ones.. “hey let’s write this story again…“

to fly.

outofbreath — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 07:08:45 +0000

5 air planes on one starry night… and a great cloudy sky the next.

BUT IM STILL SMILING. I AM STILL ROCKING. =)

one of my friends said.. “im running so all of us can fly…”

makes sense to me. Hahahaha =)

Great new year to all!!!!!!! =D

I know St. Peter won’t call my name…

outofbreath — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 05:17:49 +0000

Hypocrisy aside, it would be lying if I bluntly say that I am a nice girl. (I see a few nods now.. okay a lot of nods and shouting from everyone.) I can honestly say I have done a lot of ugly deeds and I am not proud of it. God had stopped smiling over me for a long time. I felt like these words by Matt Wertz:

Yesterday morning every part of her just shut down
Getting out of bed never felt so difficult before
Every step she took led to the wrong direction
And she never made it out her door

And I had enough of those stumbles.. I am going back to the one who made me. I will lose myself to the one who found me. Still setting aside pride and hypocrisy, I’d know I will still have fallbacks. I’d still make mistakes. But I know now to tell myself that I’m too good to fall apart again because of those mistakes. I will smile and I will live on…

I guess there’s nothing anybody can throw at me now and still get hurt. I have sang my songs on my own.. lived the way I wanted it, bad things happened, mistakes were obvious, heartaches and pain scarred me… but I got out from all of it. I learned from it and I got myself back together.

I had been stuck. And the only thing left for me to do.. was to believe again. Thank God I did.

For the months that passed, I always sleep to dream, to ignore reality, and have my own safe world and stay asleep til the day I die. Lately, I can’t even wait that long for the next day to come so I can live those dreams. Luck has been on my side lately. I know it wouldn’t stay that way forever even if I wish it will but I’ll make the most out of my life now… So I can look back and contentedly say I have live my life well and long enough to realize it.

i had the urge to drink…

outofbreath — Sun, 02 Nov 2008 09:23:38 +0000

Green Cross alcohol this morning.

Nurp, not suicidal. But that plastic bottle was tempting and mocking me like crazy. I don’t know why.

I lied to priest.. now this. WTF is happening to me.

I didn’t drink it. I’m still fine, I think?

No to California Prop8. Yes to Equal Rights!

outofbreath — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 10:19:02 +0000

http://tinaloops.multiply.com/journal/item/795/The_California_Proposition_8_No_No_No

There are people living everyday…
expecting tomorrow…
to be different from today.

Take a stand and help make a change. A change where people can live happily and equally. Law must be made for people to grow independently. And California Proposition 8 conflicts that truth. The true meaning of law and human rights is that under it, we SHOULD BE treated equally.

“	…recognition of the inherent dignity and of the equal and inalienable rights of all members of the human family is the foundation of freedom, justice and peace in the world	”
—Preamble to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, 1948

Laws are inevitably moral. It means it is UPRIGHT, straightforward, OPEN, virtuous and HONORABLE. The morals of a society change, but that doesn’t mean morality itself changes. I think that morality transcends cultures and individuals and there should not be any culture that doesn’t honor honesty, fairness, bravery, integrity, justice etc. I believe that laws are moral. And for this, we should fight to what is equally moral to every human being born.

California Proposition 8 is truly unfair and wrong. Let people have their way, with the rights they are born with. It’s nothing to be ashamed of or something to take away from other people. Treating every other people equally, gay or straight, is easier than looking down on them. It always has been easier that way.

Kudos to those who fight and stand upright for true freedom!

Break Out

outofbreath — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 12:49:52 +0000

Captivation break out.

Got my permission to
Break the tradition
No limited editions
This is a persistent
Change of disposition
No more inhibitions
I don’t wanna spend my life wishing

I definitely broke my own rule. I surely did not consider any personal inhibitions. There’s nobody I had to ask permission from. It was the utmost unique disposition I had ever had in months. What I did was a call for breaking free and giving in to what I want. So yes I am happy that I gave in to my needs. But I’m not sure if it was really the right thing to ask for. Sucks ball.

I must be over my head right now. And I think I wished too much for something I can not handle. This was more of starting over from scratch with carboard boxes to an imagination gone loco. I must be crazy to think I can do this. And maybe a few months after this, I’ll never be wishing as vague as I did a few months ago.

I got this crazy idea right now that I just created a fake empire. F A K E. And who would want to put this slow show up with me? He must be on the edge too. Gone kookoo like yours truly. Kuhrayzee.

Get wild with me baby!

FREE Handbags!!

outofbreath — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 06:44:18 +0000

Handbag Planet is giving away free 24 bags to celebrate their launch on October 15, 2008. They will be giving away one bag per hour for 24 hours on their launching day. To enter their contest, you can check it out at HANDBAG PLANET

I am WANTING these bags…

Don’t they take your breath away? Hahahaha. They did it to me.

Blogging makes my life easier because of these things… =D I hope I win. =D

A Passion for Either

outofbreath — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 04:31:28 +0000

It must either have been a great passion for traveling and exploring different places or a greater passion of going as far as 1000 km (or was it more?) away from where I grew up.

But this place has just taken my breath away.. And I wouldn’t mind losing my breath the second time around..

And must have been fate that Gossip Girl agreed with me when she said..

“A simple trip to the beach could be all it takes to clear our heads and open our hearts and write a new ending to an old story.

There are those who got burned by the heat. They just want to forget and start over while there are others who want each moment to last forever. But everyone can agree on one thing: tans fade, highlights go dark and we all get sick of sand in our shoes.

But the end of summer is the beginning of a new season so we find ourselves looking to the future. You ain’t seen nothing yet.”

xoxo

OutofBreath

Walking is good.

outofbreath — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 12:30:47 +0000

Funny how I just had a literal out of breath moment.

Will edit the post later. Watching Brothers & Sisters. Teehihihi.

Blood. Buhlud. Buhluduh.

outofbreath — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 14:59:43 +0000

Cute. Funny. Interesting how a 1-syllable word ends up being a 3-syllable word.